Too Desperate To Date

You haven’t had a date in months, and it certainly isn’t due to lack of trying! But for some reason nothing you do seems to work; not your flirting, not your internet dating profile and not your pleas to family and friends to introduce you to someone, anyone!

Nothing turns off potential daters faster than appearing so desperate for a date that you’ll do almost anything to get one. In extreme cases, dating desperation can seem almost creepy. At best it’s just kind of sad.

As with most things in life, when you try too hard to succeed at something, you end up failing. Just like you can’t force that white ball onto the green, you can’t force someone to fall for you; it usually just happens on its own. When you appear desperate for a date the only thing potential dates will feel is pressure, not desire.

Those little white lies you tell in the hopes of appearing more attractive to someone are going to end up biting you in the butt sooner or later, so you might as well stop telling them. Potential daters will be able to tell, deep down, that you’re lying and along with appearing desperate, you’ll come across as insincere.

Agreeing with everything. When you’re having a conversation with a potential date, do you find yourself agreeing with everything they say, even if you don’t? Though this isn’t outright lying, you’re not being true to yourself. You cannot expect someone to get to know the real you if you don’t have any opinions of your own. Agreeing for the sake of agreeing is for wimps.

You’re a doormat. You’ve been stood up so many times you’ve lost count, and rather than tell your date how you feel, you simply accept his/her explanation. That’s the sign of a doormat. If you don’t respect yourself, why should anyone else? Self respect is the key to self confidence; and a must if you don’t want to appear desperate.

Sleeping with someone before you feel ready to do so is the ultimate act of dating desperation. And you’re sacrificing an important part of yourself by doing so. There’s nothing wrong with sowing your oats, so to speak, just make sure you really want to grow oats and you’re not just doing it because the farmer wants you to!

Desperate Daters will date anyone who has a heartbeat. If any of the above sounds like you, take a breather and use this dating downtime as an opportunity to for self improvement. Once you’re at ease in your own skin, you’ll no longer come across as desperate.

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Filed under: Dating

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